iPeace Members with Disabiling Health Issues- How Many Are We & Don't talk About It ?

*This is a discussion I wrote on my profile page in July. I have some really interesting replies to it there if anyone is interested in reading~please go to my page. I would love to have some feedback from this group. Thanks and smile...

I wonder, as I go from page to page,meeting new people-making friends, just how many like me are dealing with disabeling health issues? Whether it be ourselves or a family member,and why we rarely talk about it ? I know why I don't.Not here or other social sites.As I go about telling more about me and learning about others. I often know,whether they tell me or not,that like me,they are dealing with health issues that have become disabeling, limiting abilities to physically participate in life outside our homes. Sitting or lying down as I do in front of our computers,participating in life from our homes or bedroom as I do. Not discussing this to anyone else,rarely- if ever. Feeling like a "cyber" person.
Because most all our lives are spent online, our activities are almost, or all online.Our social life is online. Here on iPeace (and other sites).
I have been an activist/advocate &community organizer for nearly 20yrs now.Since Feb. 2007 unable to work. Since last summer i've only been able to do so online. As it became increasingly more difficult over the years I had to cut back on my activities. By 2001 only able to work part time for a local non profit. I still continued as volunteer for other non profits on a more limited level. It was heartbreaking,frustrating and depressing. I found much I could do from my home,my bed online,getting more and more involved as a cyber activist. In Oct,2008 I found iPeace(from facebook) and soon after became my home.The few times I did open up and answer questions from new friends here,as we go about getting to know each other better- soon after telling more about my health issues,they were never to be heard from again. Why, you may ask? Why, I asked myself? I suppose is because they don't know what to say? I suppose is not due to not caring,but because possibly they do care causing akwardness in wanting to help,say the right thing..but not knowing what that is ?.I honestly don"t know? ..But I prefer to think that my "new friend" or already a friend ,that is someone I became close to, that had asked a question which led to needing to explain limitations, didn't dissapear due to not caring but not knowing what to say. I don't know? I rarely ever mention,nor want to talk about my health issues. The fact is whether or not I am correct in reasons those friends never reply & disappear after I answer further inquiry into my health issues,it still hurts. I tell myself it doesn't matter,but it does. I tell myself they don't intend to be hurtful,but it still hurts.
To All here on iPeace: with or family members dealing with disabling health problems please come here to this discussion. Share with me and each other why you think :
1) We don't talk about it.
2) After we do friends,people dissappear.

and in our efforts for world Peace,inner Peace,to help make this a better world. Do you think it really matters that we don't talk about our disabling health issues?

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Replies to This Discussion

Leah, I have talked about it- and had a lot of friends, on
Chat!

Later, I have slowly revealed my own problems, the first was about my son, he is hard of hearing.
People have accepted me. I am so grateful.

I have had a lot of help through my son's new network with deaf people and sign language. I have met a lot of people who are not "normal" and I feel pretty fine with them. It's nice not having to use my voice but being able to communicate visually as well, as I have done with drawing and writing. It gives me a rest.


I am very thankful that my son is the person he is. It has been problematic (of course), but in all that we found all these wonderful new concepts of life. i appreciate you talking about this, Leah.
Love to you,
Erika.
Yes, I have talked with you about your son and the deafness. I didn't know you have a network for him now? awesome erica. I have missed you & chat. As noone seems to use it here on iPeace anymore.
Thank you for the reply erica :-) and your appreciation.
Much Love to you too my friend ~hugs x
Well, as I said isn't something I talk about often ..if ever, but does come up in conversation sometimes.
P & L
Yes, I did sailor..bummer cuz I LOVE to dance!! I truly miss it..perhaps someday I'll be able kick up my heels again, or mosh :-)
Aww ty sailor ;-)..yes I agree is often not knowing what to say & feeling uncomfortable? don't know but is what I feel. thanks for commenting here. hugs & cya' later .
Splendid Leah D . This discussion is really needed.
I think there are many reasons for why people do not talk about either physical or metal health problems here.
Since that put the shining aureole a little at an angle and all the talk about Karma, which can make the poor sick think it`s his/hers own fault somehow...
In a "perfect world" who want to talk about any shortcomings where health problems are considered as one...
It´s just so sad, That`s why it was needed with a group that says "we cannot always shine" sometime because of pain not always from the soul but our body...That`s why a discussion like this one also is so welcomed.

I write to try to repress my pain , but when I also got problems with my eyes I talked about it here, since If they will not get better writing will no longer be an option...Then I couldn´t stay quite...

I didn`t quite understand what illness you are suffering from but it worried me and I`m sad for your sake...
Life is really not perfect....But we all try to make the best out of it...*smile*


These flowers is for you *smile*
oh.

i just want to comment a little on the karma-thing.

Nowadays, people travel to places like India, they come home and they are "Indianised"- or maybe they take yoga-classes in their home country and they learn about Indian philosophies. This is part of the New Age era, as I see it. It's fine.


But,
with the people who live in India and grew up with all these issues, I think it is slightly different.

I do not want words like "karma" to be hijacked by western concepts, just as little as the whole of Christianity should be spoken for by one christian group.

Karma does not mean that you have to have a "straight path" without illnesses. Karma includes the sadness and the joy... like yin/yang.
Yeah but a little of that philosophy ,you get what you deserve. is still to be find in this phenomena. Even, as you say, when something get adopted from another culture, it can be somewhat misused.

No the Karma thing I will not buy...and I will not get punish today for something I maybe did in an former life...It doesn`t make sense to me...
The theory that we are here on earth to learn and develop and for that we need trials, yes there I can find something. Since we know that just trials give us other perspectives on life. and make us more humble...
haha, you're funny. it's not about being punished by former lives, not as I know it anyway.

But lets say I am going through a difficult period now, then maybe I can get an explanation about WHY, looking back at what might have happened in adifferent time - that way I know better how to deal with it.

I thought we had the same thing here, but that might be a pagan view, I do not know.
Now the idea of karma I have never understood., I may be funny or I have misunderstood the whole thing.
But let`s say that my health problems give me a terrible time. just now How can the Law of Karma make me understand my sufferance better?
I may learn to life with my pain and as I said before it gives me totally different perspectives.
But Please do not ask me to understand it better through that law. Today I have so much pain and also hard to see. So right now I just feel that life is not fair... That`s all I can say....
I am sorry, Gunilla.
I forgot
that I am half Indian.

Forgive me. I wish you were out of pain.
You are helping so many... I think to me karmic law is just part of the whole hindu society. It is not so much a law, but more like an instrument.
But of course I understand you are different (from me) I am so sorry.
No it`s OK to discuss it..*smile*.and I do understand you with your roots in India
If I had had the same background as you who knows how I have reasoned.

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