at seventeen i signed up, a Reservist-
1-11-01- i remember clearly- nervous
first application accepted- Soldier in training
Cadet by 9/11- the principles now ingrained
though training- unfortunately- stayed, incomplete
missed A.I.T. twice because i could not ‘compete’
for the few spots open to training the Young-
Kids- to serve, protect, fight and draw blood.
generally discharged eventually to Wait politely
on your tables- Ruby Tuesday, two of them
for a short time, even, maybe six nights a week
personally i feel after being denied a promotion
getting out before you left me was something
i had a right to- let me serve where i fit or nothing
after joining the Corps- price: freshman’s demotion
and a personnel services reject- so to teaching
not at first, of course, only an assistant
this following a year spent drinking in England
serving drinks drunk at Christmas- never collecting a check.
and another year or so waiting- a blunder, i expect-
Bush’s Army wouldn’t train, promote or keep me
and i applied for his C.I.A.- twice- awaiting eagerly
a reply, a job- a chance to serve this nation
maybe i didn’t try hard enough- too impatient?
the next best chance i had to succeed was teaching
mathematics- Geometry, Trigonometry- O.C.H.S., young
twenty-one- maybe two years older than the oldest
student- unfortunately for them, learned as i did it
Everything- the math, discipline, crowd-control, public speaking
how to make students work... (sometimes) shut up instantly
but i couldn’t handle it (or didn’t get paid enough to..)
so i left- uncertified, anyway- try was all i could do.
a few months off- to work out some family problems-
no details, but i have a few complaints against them
my family, that is- and maybe the problems, too
don’t worry about it now- it’s all done and through
sober now for... going on about two years
except for a week i had ‘just a few’ beers
my next job was answerer in a call center
not calling people against their will- a telemarketer.
not really a salesman- titled a representative
in six months promoted, i think indicative
of promise, talent (maybe)- or just a quick learner
promoted again before the end- ‘trained’ an intern
in analysis of numbers, profits and losses
a little bit on surveying- working for my boss’s
job, eventually (maybe), if only i’d stuck with
it- the idea of the trees- felled... for this?
to send out millions of pages simply to guilt
anyone into buying something the Chinese built?
that one, too, is through, so now i’m writing to you
the only thing i ever really wanted to do.
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