I joined this group in 2009.  Since then I have written nothing.  Today, I received an iPeace email and decide to open it up since 2009.  It's part of my pattern of opening up new doors and not committing myself to the bigger picture.  

There was an old message I received from someone talking about fear.  This was perfect because this morning, I felt fear running through my body.  Anxiety overload and a desire to reach out for a drink at 10:oo in the morning consumed my thoughts.  I just began a new relationship and we are so close in spirit.  But then, like in any other relationship I have been in, I started to fear that I will lose him.  I feared the distance in our long distance relationship will drive him away from me and there is nothing in the relationship that tells this.  I feel in adequate of living my own life without him now and I am becoming more dependent on him.  Is this what relationship addiction is?  

I am the only person that needs to realize my own potential in this life to be confident and be my own shining light.  I feel stuck.

Is there anyone out there who can help me realize where these feelings are coming from?

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Comment by Susandale on September 28, 2011 at 2:49pm

you have met your fear and it , i believe as you do,   comes from somewhere else. not from the now.

it is likely unaddressed past issues.

you can meditate forever and become able to embrace it.

i'd prefer to get to the core. but am not  finished that work yet.

some online helpers w/ holographic repatterning help to let these old stories drop off.

i just read an old paperback about a woman who took 4 months to get off the planet, and face her fears.

it took savings and a committment. she was far from rich.

she 'got' stuff about her upbringing  that freed her. she had had an addicted and failed history of relationships. she wasn't living  her full potential [ a recent phd from harvard and she was looking for typing  jobs!].

you can just plow through it, but i find i keep plowing everyday.

i use many tools; i meditate, walk, pivot[ turn from the negative to the positive], retreat and more.

i have found all helpful, but the holographic really freed me each time. a reminder for me to get back to it. www.prosperity.com  offers some of that help[ and a free 1 or 2 wks w/  their program w/ no pressure to pay up afterwards], plus try a search. there's a woman near boston who was good. sorry i cant recall who. and i am about to unsubscribe from this site. oh, alanon helps, too. i also  joined ages ago, and realize i never have found a bond here. many blkessings on your life. susan






Comment by G.P. on September 28, 2011 at 12:50pm



Fear has different cause for individuals - hope these quotes will bring some comfort.

I would suggest looking up online articles/finding reading which would be suitable for your present challenge. Best wishes.


° The single most empowering thing we can do for ourselves is to transform fear.

While fear contains tremendous power, it doesn't propel us forward and upward, but, rather, drags us down and chains us to the past.

Freeing ourselves from fear is a loving intention because, as fear subsides, we are better able to access the soft, sweet power of our hearts, which naturally leads to loving ourselves and others more freely and completely. Sue Patton Thoele


° We are all afraid of something. But that shouldn't stop us from going onevery day.

We should not always walk in fear of the shadow while we are in the light.

It is certain we will not know when or how the difficult and bad times will come, but if we accept that they will come, then they are easier to face when they do.

And always remember that anything that causes the shadow is smaller than the source of light. Joseph M. Marshall III


 ° Fear is like a little garden spider that makes us jump back or the poor lost bee on the steering wheel that we blame for our automobile wreck.

The problem in fear is our response -- the way we treat animals or insects that frighten us. . . . Fear is also the universal scapegoat we blame when we take flight from intimacy or shrink up inside ourselves in a thousand little ways. Dan Millman


 ° Fear is like fire. If controlled it will help you; if uncontrolled, it will rise up and destroy you. People's actions depend to a great extent upon fear.

We do things either because we enjoy doing them or because we are afraid not to do them. John F. Milburn


° It is not that you must be free from fear.

The moment you try to free yourself from fear, you create a resistance against fear.

Resistance, in any form, does not end fear.

What is needed, rather than running away or controlling or suppressing or any other resistance, is understanding fear;

that means, watch it, learn about it, come directly into contact with it.

We are to learn about fear, not how to escape from it,

not how to resist it through courage and so on. J. Krishnamurti

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