Newport Manners & Etiquette: Newport Flower Show + Polo Matches + Boys

How to make peace between post-graduation dueling eighth graders? In the midst of the Newport Flower Show, polo matches in Portsmouth, and mother-of-the-bride dress code at the height of the wedding season, were the best questions to Didi Lorillard at NewportManners this week.

Q. We're coming over from the South Shore to go to the Newport Flower Show this weekend and my friends and I want to know about ladies hats. Do you have the inside on the kind of hat to wear? A.W., Duxbury, MA

A. Upon entering the Newport Flower Show, start by heading to Lisa Stubbs' hat kiosk. The foremost milliner in New England, Mrs. Stubbs handcrafts all of her popular hats and they come in an array of styles and prices. Whether you're looking for solutions to keeping the sun off of your face or searching to find that dark and mysterious hat to top off your favorite cocktail outfit, you'll find it at Lilo.

To get a sense of Lisa's natural high style, here are photos of Lisa and her friends at the 2014 Newport Flower Show.

What to wear to my daughter's wedding?

Q. I'm searching for a mother of the bride outfit that is a sophisticated look suitable for an older mother of the bride to wear to her daughter's August wedding. If someone is asked to describe the way I look, I'd like them to say I'm pleasantly plump. The dresses I've been trying on just aren't me. I look in the mirror and say to myself, "What am I doing in this silly dress." Do you have a creative solution to this wedding dilemma? Anonymous, Watch Hill, RI

A. Living close to Newport, you are in luck. The answer is at the Newport Flower Show this weekend. At booth #24 you'll find wonderful special occasion jackets by the ever so chic Maria Pucci.

In choosing one of Maria Pucci's handmade jackets you have more options to coordinate with the wedding colors, which typically match the color scheme of the wedding, by simply changing a trim, button or other detail to coordinate with the theme.

For instance instead of a corsage, your jacket can have a floral pattern in one of the wedding colors. The beauty of the Newport Long Coat is that it is a formal jacket. Because it is not a long dress, it won't compete with the bride's wedding gown, the arms are covered for a religious ceremony, and the mother of the bride is freer to move around the reception to greet and dance with guests.

These beautiful special occasion jackets are not only perfect for the mother of the bride, but are a popular choice as cocktail attire -- especially for wearing when entertaining or being entertained day or night -- because they are made for the young at heart.

Ahead of time go to Maria-Pucci.com to check out her brilliant designs. Here is one of the looks Maria Pucci recommends for the mother of the bride. See you at the Flower Show! ~Didi

Newport polo match dress code

Q. I am attending a polo match tomorrow in Newport and I have no clue what to wear. I have many dresses, most of them form fitting. I do not know what is appropriate to wear though.

Clothes and Nothing to Wear, Newport

A. Hold your horses. Polo match dress code is not that complicated. Think about comfort and protecting your face from the hot sun. You may find yourself picnicking at your tailgate, so wearing a dress that is not too short is more comfortable if you're going to sit on the grass. Find a mid-calf length dress or skirt in your closet, a loose fitting shirt and belt it.

Top off the look with a small brimmed straw hat that isn’t too fussy or prissy — but no fake flowers on the brim.

Most importantly, if you wear heels, wear cork wedges or flats. Spiked heels will catch you up by digging into the turf and we wouldn’t want you to trip over you feet. Here are some looks you may be able to pull together from your full closet. ~Didi

Eighth graders brawling after graduation

Q. Our son recently graduated eighth grade from our country day school and got himself into a nasty altercation with one of his classmates. He came home from one of the graduation parties with his eye glasses broken and his face bleeding from being punched in the face. I texted the boy's mother asking if we could meet soon for coffee telling her what had happened. She responded with, "boys will be boys." Texting back I said we really need to talk. We were looking for the boy to apologize. We didn't get it. She keeps putting me off, but we don't think the boys should end their school year with the incident unresolved. Any suggests? Anonymous

A. Texting the naughty boy's mother inviting her to your house for coffee would be a gracious move. It will make her feel that it is more of a social visit and less confrontational. Bring out your best china coffee cups, but don't go so far as to bake a coffee cake. Ask her if she thinks the boys should hash out the problem. The catalyst no doubt was a girl. Each boy should tell his side of the story. In a perfect world, the brawler would apologize and the lads would shake hands. But we don't don't know the whole story.

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